Feeling Safe As A Family
Previous StoryNext StoryAt 4:am, my head finally sank into the overly soft pillow in the attic bedroom. I had been waiting for the last child to arrive at the cabin we rented for the holidays.
I was thankful as I breathed a sigh of relief, knowing that, once again, our children were under one roof. If I listened intently, I could almost hear each of them breathe, though they were sleeping on different levels of the three-story cabin surrounded by tall gold and red trees.
It was a feeling every Mother longs to feel with her children. If they are all in one place, close, we think we can protect them, even when they are grown. But, in reality, we know that's not true. Each family had its own life and mountains to climb. We were one family sharing this holiday season under one roof, but we were all at different stages of our lives.
Our daughter and her husband were buying their first home together and planning for their second child. They were proud and excited about the things happening in their life. Even with a toddler underfoot, they still maintained a certain amount of order and minimal noise in their home.
With three small children, our youngest son and his wife were on the other end of the family. The noise didn't bother them since that was part of their everyday life, and they had learned to live with the daily messes. Our son was pursuing his dream of starting his own business, and buying a house was still a dream for the future.
Our middle son was still enjoying the freedom and struggle of college life. He and his wife had not started a family yet. They could shower the niece and nephews with hugs and cookies and give them back to their parents. Not accustomed to any noise in their home but that of their choosing, I could see them occasionally flinch when the nephews’ and niece's energy levels were at their peak.
Our holidays together reminded me of when they were small. I loved rainy days or snowy days, or any days that kept us all inside together. Of course, everyone else would be complaining about the weather, but my heart was always content–cooking warm foods, playing games, or watching television with them.
Sometimes, I would listen to their problems as they sat on the stools around the kitchen counter, break up their arguments as they fought over the remote control, or endeavor to make them understand how special each of them was. On infrequent occasions, they would all agree and burst into uncontrollable laughter, usually at my expense. It wasn't a lot different then as it was this Thanksgiving season. I wanted to listen to each of them, help them with their problems, and remind them to love and be patient with each other.
But the rain showers and holidays end, and everyone eventually goes their separate ways. But the anchor of a family is more than being under the same roof, fixing each other's problems, or even agreeing on everything. It is sharing joys and sorrows, laughter and jokes, hopes and dreams; it loves each other unconditionally no matter what happens in our lives and is there whenever we can. That's a safe feeling for all of us.