My Vietnam Soldier’s Story

My husband was a cook in the Vietnam war. One morning after praying for God’s protection for himself and his comrades, he felt he should go into the mess hall early to prepare for his baking duties. He had to convince the head cook to do his work during the evening meal. Typically, he started baking after dinner and worked late while the soldiers stayed in the lighted building to write their letters and play cards. After finishing his kitchen duties, they all had to leave because it was his job to close the facility.

Next to the Mess Hall was the EM(Enlisted Men’s) Club, where the soldiers watched movies once a week, but it closed early because one of the movie reels was missing. The soldiers were frustrated and angry when they had to go back to their barracks early,

After they were all settled into their bunks, the enemy dropped a 155 mm rocket exactly where the men had gathered only an hour before. The enemy fire destroyed the Mess Hall and the EM Club.

I didn’t know my husband when he was in service, but we met and married a few years after the war ended.   I wasn’t a part of his life then. However, as a result of the Vietnam war, the pain he carried with him became a part of my life, too.

We didn’t talk much about his service in the army before we married, and today, 50  years later, I am still learning the things he saw, the things he felt, and the scars in his heart.

The first time we watched fireworks together, I could tell he was tense but didn’t understand until later that the fireworks’ popping reminded him of gunfire in the jungles of Vietnam. Sudden loud noises, especially the whirring of a helicopter, would cause him to flinch.

He sits against a wall to see what’s in front of him. He learned in the war that it wasn’t safe to know what was around you at all times.

Whenever he watched war movies at home, I didn’t know whether it would make him relive that time in his life. But it was as though he was looking for a story that validated what he remembered as a soldier.

He seemed to have found the story he was looking for in a movie when we watched the 2016 film, Hacksaw Ridge. The true story of a PFC., Desmond Doss, who won the Congressional Medal of Honor, despite refusing to bear arms during World War II on religious grounds, brought back memories deep in his heart. Doss was drafted and ostracized by fellow soldiers for his pacifist stance but earned respect for saving 75 men without carrying a gun.

My husband was drafted and refused to bear arms for religious reasons. He was a young minister but had not finished his education yet. He, too, was mistreated by his fellow soldiers. However, many men would have died the night their Mess Hall was blown up had he not obeyed the voice of God by going in early.

Another war movie that touched him so deeply was, We Were Soldiers, based upon the best-selling book “We Were Soldiers Once. … and Young.” This compelling war drama depicts the true story of the first major battle between the United States and North Vietnamese forces. It is a film about uncommon valor and nobility under fire, loyalty among soldiers, and heroism and sacrifice at home and abroad.

The war scenes in this film were very graphic. But it wasn’t the bloody battle scenes that brought tears to his eyes. Instead, it was watching a mother pull her children to the other side of the airport when a veteran walked by. It was watching another soldier weep after the war was over because he survived, and his friends did not.

Ironically, one of the most agonizing parts of the Vietnam War for many soldiers, including my husband, was the return home – the long, shameful walk through the airport as strangers shied away from in quiet judgment.

The other agony is much like the 9/11 survivors’ experience. They lived when the people they loved and knew did not. The relief and the guilt of surviving will haunt their memories for a lifetime – soldiers and civilians alike.

As I watched these movies with my husband, I thought of how young our soldiers were when they went to war. Still, many years later, the sounds of battle are only a nightmare away in their minds.

The thing that seems to haunt them the most is why so many had to die. What was the purpose? Lieutenant General Harold G. Moore and war correspondent Joseph Galloway wrote the book; We Were Soldiers Once…And Young. Moore said he was sent to Vietnam to lead his men into battle, but in the end, they fought only to save each other.

My husband is a Chaplain now. He serves beside his comrades at the VFW(Veterans of Foreign Wars).

They are still saving each other as they talk of their experiences, pain, and survival when and where they served. They are still working together to help our widows, orphans, and dependents of needy or disabled veterans. They promote Americanism through patriotism education and constructive service to our local communities.